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adam!!

November 2012

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adam!!

This is really more of a drabble than anything; it stuck in my head and wouldn't leave me alone. I should warn you: here there be angst, friends.   



He's clear with Cook, spills everything out and his voice waivers and he shakes, and gosh he feels so stupid standing there stammering out that he has a crush on him, that he hadn't even had it when they were on the show or tour but after and just gosh, he's not sure because he's never done this before but he thinks he loves Cook.

David bares his soul, not caring that everyone calls him a kid or that Cook has a girlfriend (gosh, that's actually really bad and he swallows the guilt because he has to be honest. That's just the kind of guy he is.) And when David has let everything out, from the way his heart pounds when he hears Cook's voice to the way he's taken to looking up pictures of him on Google and that he misses him so bad sometimes his chest hurts, he feels like a weight is lifted, because he was clear with Cook.

And Cook is clear with him back.

So David takes his broken heart back to Utah, and tries to remember that God is everything, that he was blessed by being on American Idol and he should be thankful.

He tries not to wonder why God decided to let his heart wrap it's arms around Cook, and why he's not good enough for him. Sure, he's still small for his age and um, not that good looking and sometimes he can't breathe but well, Cook should love him!

And Cook turns his headphones up as loud as they go, trying to drown himself in music so he won't have to think of the kid, hazel eyes wide and mouth parted, hands fisted and body shaky as he told David he wasn't good enough. Wasn't what he wanted. It was the hardest lie David Cook had ever had to sell in his life.

But he was just a kid.

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